5 - L** Ya**el Says "Pu**y" During "El Toro"
The concept is simple, classic even. Let the band (may I humbly suggest one called Buttsex?) play a riff so cliched it borders on racism. When the riff stops, and it is your turn, say something funny. House favorites are inside jokes, but anything goes.
Was "pu**y" the first word you thought of? Are you wearing an AC/DC t-shirt? Thanks for reading, L**!
4 - The Major Briggs Trio Replaces Bill B At Keyboards
Mainly this is shocking because I am one of the worst musicians ever. But I am an honest and expressive soundsmith and a good listener, which was exactly what a band dedicated to making fun the poor lyrics of someone with a man crush on Morrisey needed at the time.
Two important points:
1) I took the name "Salty Miss Clairol" for the stage at this juncture.
2) Bill B would, in an event that can only be described as both "outrageous" and "Rock And Roll", get a bj from my girlfriend, who was living with her ex-girlfriend at the time. Read that last sentance again. Also, good effing LORD.
3 - David Bowie's Return From Berlin With Fascism On His Mind
This happened in 1976, the year of my birth. And for good measure Boy George was waiting for him in the train station. One of the few ways you can be linked to Bowie and Boy George without the use of male genetalia and/or cocaine.
2 - Tie: Anal Conan Presents "Destroyer"/"Grow the Hair Past The Heart"
One withou the mighty Ray Gun, one with. Maybe not my best showing, maybe so, but certainly my favorites. Te outrageousness is derived from the fact that I did ok on each.
1 - Gentlemen Prefer AIDS
The lost albums, coupled with "D**k My F**k", are my best showing. A cry for help. Rock and Roll without a doubt, and outrageous in it's own right. Hooray for Rock, be it dead or alive.
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2 comments:
5 - I feel responsible for L** even being able to say "pu**y" because, as our other reader(s) may or may not know, he was my first roomate. Sure, it was pretty obvious that L** was "not like us" and didn't really have any business attending one of our important Bu**se* recording sessions, but we were all too nice to tell him to go away. L**, if you're reading, I'm sorry. Look deep inside yourself and you'll realize that you just didn't get it. Pu**y is not a laughing matter unless you're Beavis and Butthead or Kevin Smith. Pu**y also has no space in "art rock". Even if our name was Bu**se*.
4 - I believe I pushed pretty hard for you to replace Bill because he sucked and was kind of an asshole. You may think you sucked, but in reality your ideas and improvisational prowess was at the center of what we later did in the two greatest rock bands of all time. I forgot about the bj thing... yeah, that's pretty fucking outrageous. Those were crazy times, I guess. It's all so funny to think that we had to kick people out of Bu**se*!!!
3 - Is "train station" a cute little term for "ferocious butthole"?
2 - Pat Quillen stated that "Grow the Hair" was the best thing ever recorded by anybody ever. Still feel like your contribution was merely ok? PQ doesn't lie. He tells it like it fuckin' is. Not to sound like a pu**y, but you are the heart and soul of that performance.
1 - These recordings must see the light of day if Rock and Roll is to survive. Long live cock.
Boy, I sure do love us.
I thought the proper spelling of Ray Gunn included two copies of the letter 'n'...
And "Grow the Hair" was the greatest thing ever recorded by anyone ever. I still listen to it fondly.
Of course, nothing like a rousing chorus of F**k Y** H**ts**l to stir my blood.
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